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“What’s meant to be will always find a way”, “What is for me will come to me”, "Sa ki pou mwen lavalas paka potel ale". I heard these words very often and for a time I believed that it explained the natural course of life. These words also give hope for the future and secure the idea that everything will be alright at the end.


Nevertheless when I surrender my mind to God's wisdom, some familiar thoughts and words even if they make sense to my logic did no longer align with the Truth. It sounds like a lie that keeps us in our comfort zone and holds us repeating patterns of dysfunction and still makes us think that we’re gonna make it without changing our ways. It makes us believe that the universe is our buddy waiting to respond to our whims and keep the same opportunities hanging around until we decide that we are ready.


The story of the Israelites wandering in the desert in the book of Numbers pictures that very well. God gave them a land, He gave them a promise. It was theirs! But because of the spiritual path of doubts, worries and disobediences they choose to take , they got stuck 40 years in what was supposed to take them 11 days . The generation that receives the promise never entered the promise land. They disqualified themselves for something that was meant for them because they didn’t want to change their ways.


It is true that The Almighty has a plan for our lives. He has a plan for each and everyone of us! A plan to prosper and not to harm us, a plan to give us hope and a future but this plan becomes active until we embrace His will and purpose for our lives, until we let Him lead the way. In His perfect goodness, He will never give us things that we are not ready for and to become ready we have to do the work and learn the proper way to manage these things so they don't slip out of our hands because we are unqualified or incompetent.


Stepping into a new level with God surely requires our full commitment. Commitment walks in closeness with change of behavior and self abandonment (leaving behind  what we were attached to but no longer serve us). God is not a headsman, He is loving and kind. He desires us to become the best version of ourselves. He gives us the Holy Spirit to mold our hearts, to give us instructions.  He won’t force us to change and even less force His way into our lives. He works with us ! We can’t do His part and He won’t do ours.


Saying « what’s meant for us will always find a way » is assuming that God works and our timing, even if we are being stubborn and disobedient, He will patiently wait for us to change and continuously send the same opportunities. That way of thinking is far from the Truth. I have learned from my leaders that God's promises come with their instructions and the key to fulfilling His promises lies in obedience.



That high position can be yours and you still miss it because you didn’t not learn that new skill to be qualified for it. That job was yours and because of were too lazy, you got there late every day until you got fired. That scholarship was yours and you got kicked out of school because you spent your nights partying instead of studying and your grades were too low. God really wants the best for us and sadly there’s an enemy that comes after us to steal, kill and destroy every good thing that our Father wants to give us. That enemy desires to hold us captive of our own ways. He is ready to deploy strategies to influence our mind and keep us in darkness. He wants us to stay in the comfort of our flesh and mediocrity.



What is Eternal is the Word of God. His plan will always come to pass, and in His plan, no one is essential. God can use another for what He called one to do because He will do the work with the one who has an open heart, who’s humble enough to know that being used by God is an honor and a privilege, the one that gives his ''yes and his trust through the way.



The good news is we still have authority to choose. We can choose His way, the best way. We can prepare our heart to follow the instructions of the Holy Spirit.  We can never un-qualify ourselves for what was meant for us and pass by the Promise if we walk in obedience.



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As I was sitting on my bed, crying all the tears I had, sliding a shaver on my wrist, I felt a soothing pain. For a few seconds, it felt comforting beacause the physical pain replaced the state of mental paralysis that I was in for a few weeks already, the agony of that open wound in my chest, the calamities of my shattered dreams, and the wailing of my soul that was so lost, engulfed in unbearable darkness. But although it felt good, it never felt right.


Later, I realized that with every cut came a price. With every cut came a scar, maybe not on my flesh, but in my heart, telling the story of how weak, helpless, and cowardly I was and of self-harm not being a form of art. It's crazy how the world lies to us and makes us believe that we can find real, long-lasting comfort in anything other than the Lord, that there's something out there that can make us feel better.


I fell for it, tried so many things, until I found myself sitting on my bed, crying all the tears I had, with a shaver in my hand, cutting myself to get a break from the mess that my life had become. I had hit rock bottom. I had to admit it. I knew that I had to turn my face to the only One that could heal me, the One with the double-edged Sword that can devide bones from narrow and revive me, mind, body, and soul.


I used my last breath to call on Lord, He answered. I asked Him for help, He provided.

Took me under His wings and processed to put back the broken pieces of my life.

The healing happened, but it didn't happen in a day. Healing is not a quick linear process. It takes time, dedication, and intentionality.


If you're reading this and you are going through a season where self-harm, endless drinking, partying, smoking and so many things of the sort seem to be your only solace, I'm here to tell you that it won't last. If you ever find yourself sitting on your bed, feeling lost and broken, hanging on for dear life, call on the mighty name of Jesus. He will come sit right next to you, He will dry your tears, and He will redeem you and make all things new.


The other day, I was explaining to somebody that I used to drink a lot before, and she refused to believe me because I couldn't even finish a Piña colada. I looked like such an innocent. It's was not the first time this had happened. People don't usually believe my testimony. This time, I took a moment to try to understand why that was, and when I finally did, it made me so happy because, once again, the Bible proved to be true.


God keeps His promises, and He means what He says. Paul said:" Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new" (2 Corinthians 5:15). This means that the past is really the past, and I no longer look like mine. I'm free indeed from my old sins, my old self, her struggles, her traumas, and her shortcomings.


When you come to Jesus, He really makes everything new, He washes you and makes you white as snow, takes your sins so far away from you; as far as the orient is from the occident. He truly sees you as He sees Jesus, spotless. Now that I know that you'd never believe it if I told you where Jesus took me, call me "righteous and Saint" in Jesus' name, Amen!



Lucaïna Jocelyn


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Updated: Jul 19


Étant plus jeune, ma plus grande peur était de mourir sans connaitre l’amour. Je le cherchais partout, à travers mes amis, un petit ami, ma famille mais sauf là où je devrais. J’avais pris mes parents pour modèle, ils se sont mis ensemble très jeune. Lorsqu'ils parlaient de leur couple, ils évoquaient des dizaines, des vingtaines d’années ensemble. Je savais que je voulais raconter mon histoire comme ils racontaient la leur. Au début, c’était normal pour moi de vouloir vivre une relation exactement pareille. Je n'avais tout simplement pas réalisé que c’était ma prison. Je pouvais être dans une relation, je pouvais souffrir comme jamais, mais vu que les années étaient là, avoir au moins une histoire à raconter était suffisant.


Entre temps j’avais fermé les yeux sur les pleurs, les souffrances, les peurs, les crises d’anxiétés, les pertes de sommeil, les moments où je me sentais rabaissée plus que jamais. Mon unique objectif était de pouvoir dire comme ma mère “Ça fait 10 ans” ou “je me rappelle lorsque j’avais 16 ans et ton père et moi avons fait ceci ou cela ''. J’étais tellement concentrée sur cette partie là que les autres parraissaient être des gouttes de pluie, qui après un moment allait juste sécher. Pourtant, plus les années passaient, plus je m’enfonçais avec la perte de l’estime de soi et d'autres répercussions négatives que j’aurais pu citer. J'avais l’impression d’être heureuse parce que je pouvais dire “ça fait 1 an, 2 ans, 3 ans, 4 ans que nous sommes ensemble”.



Jusqu’au jour où j’ai compris que je n’avais encore jamais connu l’amour. J'étais esclave d’une histoire qui n’était pas mienne, j’étais esclave d’un amour que j’imaginais, j’étais esclave d'années de douleurs, de souffrances et d'un conte de fée que je m’étais imaginé. Et un jour, un jour pas comme les autres, je me suis mise à genoux et j’ai ouvert ma Bible. J'ai commencé à La lire plus souvent et à participer à des réunions prières. Petit à petit, tout reprenait vie. Jésus m’avait ouvert les yeux. Je pouvais voir ce qu’Il avait fait pour moi par le biais de Son sacrifice. Je pouvais regarder autour de moi et voir Son amour. Je pouvais maintenant voir et vivre cet Amour à travers les yeux de mon fils, ou entre les lignes d'un message d’un membre de ma famille et même dans le soutien d’une amie . Je Le voyais partout.


J’ai compris que je ne pouvais aimer et être aimée parce que je ne connaissais pas l’Amour . J'ai compris également que l'amour avait un nom : Jésus. Je ne pouvais pas connaître l’Amour sans passer du temps avec l’Amour, sans aimer l’Amour, sans vivre l’Amour et sans accepter l'Amour. J’ai connu l’Amour. Ca fait maintenant 1 an et quelques mois déjà. Je n’ai pas encore rencontré l’homme avec qui je vais fonder une famille, passer le restant de mes jours mai j’ai recontré Celui qui dès le jour de ma naissance et jusqu’à aujourd’hui à tout fait pour que je sois libre et en paix. J'ai rencontré l’Homme qui bien avant ma naissance m’a aimée pas pour celle que j'allais devenir, celle que j’étais ou celle que je pensais être mais pour Celle qu’Il a créé et pour laquelle Il a donné sa vie.


Et ça c’est la première histoire d’amour que j’ai à raconter.

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